Hello crickets and roaches. Once again, I am here to continue pressing the matter about Break being such a cool guy, namely by debating the matter of his feigned disinterest in skanky yet hawt girls (Kitana). Sure, I have it in my sig, and a topic in the lounge about it already, and call him cool guy every chance I get, but I still don’t feel it’s enough.
I would like to start by saying that there isn’t really a huge difference between male and female characters, HOWEVER! If you’re going to have a female character, she has to be made the right way or become permanently flawed. Girls that dress normally are an example of a flawed female character. If you’re going to give a character a vagina, it is important that they show as much skin as possible at every possible moment! The less they wear, the better the character! Forget personality! Forget how many times it’s been done before! An Eskimo is worse of than a bikini babe any day!
But do be discreet… A completely nude woman… the power… You would lose the story to such a character, which is why characters should only be nude for brief moments of time. The rest of the time they should be as close to it as they can however.
To the left is Saber from Fate/Stay Night, who Break thinks is soooo cool. To the right is Urd from Oh my Goddess, who IS cool, and sexy, and so much better than Saber. Let’s get into that now…
You may notice that you are unable to avert your eyes from the right side of the screen. That is because of the depth of Urd’s character. You have over boob, under boob, and inner boob, only side boob and nipple is left out. Her outfit is also practically skintight despite being made of cloth. Also she’s wearing a cape, giving you the illusion that she’s resting under a silk bed sheet, waiting for you to take her.
Saber on the other hand, is a horrible character design. You have been brainwashed to think that complementary colors, attention to detail, and a strong role can redeem a female character. But even though Urd has none of this, and a silly name, you ultimately find yourself looking at her. See, the people who made saber may have made a costume that you can count the rivets on and an extensively decorated sword, but they forgot the heart of their creation: The boobs. The only bit of flesh you can see on Saber is her face and neck. The rest of her slender figure is covered with cloth (which actually looks like cloth) and steel! There is just no hope of redeeming such a crappy character.
Now for the final coop de grace, Break has also told me that when characters don’t have enough clothing on, they become less distinguished from each other, but I am here once again to prove that he speaks with fork in tongue, lies and slander! And here’s the proof:
Kitana, Jade, and Mileena. Telling them apart is easy as pie. They have different hair and different colored outfits, and different weapons. How much easier could it be? Oh, they all have identical bodies? Yea…well tell me this bub, can you improve perfection? NO! YOU CAN ONLY TAKE AWAY!
And that is why Break will always be a cool guy, and I will always be a hipster.